Support this site with your Contribution. Click on the Membership link below.
Home | Discussion Forums | Mission Statement | Membership | Links | Contact Us | Rules |

Assaultweb.net Forums  

Go Back   Assaultweb.net Forums > Discussion > Jokes and Humor

Reply
 
Thread Tools
  #1  
Old June 19th, 2016, 18:06
Reb's Avatar
Reb Reb is offline
Contributor
Moderator Token Forum Zombie
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: SC, CSA
Posts: 52,456
Default Coffee with Jesus

Coffee with Jesus

A Republican, in a wheelchair, entered a restaurant one afternoon and asked the waitress for a cup of coffee. The Republican looked across the restaurant and asked is that Jesus sitting over there?" The waitress nodded "yes"! So, the Republican requested that she give Jesus a cup of coffee, on him.

The next patron to come in was a Libertarian, with a hunched back. He shuffled over to a booth, painfully sat down, and asked the waitress for a cup of hot tea. He also glanced across the restaurant and asked, "Is that Jesus, over there?"

The waitress nodded, so the Libertarian asked her to give Jesus a cup of hot tea, "My treat."

The third patron to come into the restaurant, was a Democrat on crutches. He hobbled over to a booth, sat down and hollered, "Hey there honey! How's about getting me a cold mug of Miller Light!"

He, too, looked across the restaurant and asked, "Isn't that God's boy over there?"

The waitress nodded, so the Democrat directed her to give Jesus a cold beer. "On my bill," he said loudly so everyone in the restaurant could hear.

As Jesus got up to leave, he passed by the Republican, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Republican felt the strength come back into his legs, got up and began to praise the Lord. Jesus passed by the Libertarian, touched him and said, "For your kindness, you are healed." The Libertarian felt his back straightening up, he raised his hands and he, too, began to praise the Lord.

Then, Jesus walked, with a huge smile on his face, towards the Democrat. The Democrat jumped up and yelled, "Don't touch me...I'm on disability."
__________________
Revenge is an act of passion; vengeance of justice. - Samuel Johnson

The United States Constitution (c) 1791. All Rights Reserved.
Reply With Quote
  #2  
Old June 19th, 2016, 19:52
Herr Walther's Avatar
Herr Walther Herr Walther is offline
Your Friendly Kraut
Administrator
 
Join Date: Aug 2001
Location: The 50th CCW State
Posts: 24,030
Default Re: Coffee with Jesus

So true. I had to copy and paste that to another site I belong to.

Thanks Reb!
__________________

Peace is our Profession, War is just a Hobby...
Peace Through Strength, Victory Through Devastation...Strategic Air Command

SAC WILL BE BACK!

American by birth, made from German parts from Emmingen, Baden-Württemberg

An unhappy German is a Sour Kraut!

Das Leben ist zu kurz, um billiges Bier zu trinken!
Reply With Quote
  #3  
Old June 29th, 2016, 17:43
kARL's Avatar
kARL kARL is offline
Executive Member
 
Join Date: Jul 2000
Location: n/a
Posts: 19,580
Default Re: Coffee with Jesus

I had to make a copy too Reb
karl
__________________
Karl

http://grrrscave.blogspot.com/

Keep those e-mails and calls to your Congress people coming.
Reply With Quote
  #4  
Old February 10th, 2018, 13:55
Reb's Avatar
Reb Reb is offline
Contributor
Moderator Token Forum Zombie
 
Join Date: Sep 2000
Location: SC, CSA
Posts: 52,456
Default Re: Coffee with Jesus

I figured y'all would like that one. I sent it around too. They say the funniest jokes have a little truth in them. This one sure does.
__________________
Revenge is an act of passion; vengeance of justice. - Samuel Johnson

The United States Constitution (c) 1791. All Rights Reserved.
Reply With Quote
Reply

Thread Tools

Posting Rules
You may not post new threads
You may not post replies
You may not post attachments
You may not edit your posts

BB code is On
Smilies are On
[IMG] code is On
HTML code is Off

Forum Jump


All times are GMT -4. The time now is 16:50.


Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2018, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright 2002 to 2008 Assaultweb.net